2010... can possibly be one of my best years so far I think. Not in the conventional kind of best way- I don't think many things went good good, but yknow, in a really memorable way.
I really don't know how to sum up this year, but I think everyone spent this year growing, in a way. We're very very far away from who we were this time last year.
Haha oh shit thinking back on every single thing that made this year, wow. Big year, huh. Which kind of boils down to all the people I experienced everything with? Every emotion I felt this year, in a way- that shaped me, really.
To every single one of you who've been some part of my life this year- :)))))))))))))))) I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you
1. Yesterday we took three flights just to get here and it's like O.O Singapore-Darwin, Darwin-Melbourne, Melbourne-Hobart. I think we spent like 24 hours (including the 3 hour time difference) just getting here!
2. I love love love the weather! How even though the sun might be super hot, there's always wind which makes it anywhere from breezy to freezing cold. And it's so dry so a. nobody sweats, b. my hair is going to go through a Good Week and c. my finger skin starts peeling cos new skin is growing!!! Insert many exclamation marks because I don't know if it's freaky or cool!!!
3. Today I heard a Tasmanian Devil! They're all mostly in conservation so either you pay to maybe see them running around freely, or you pay to definitely see them in captive, or you stand outside conservation parks and listen to them call. It's kind of a beastly sound LOL but they look so cute!! ...on the poster outside.
4. Hello my darlings I might not be able to get y'all stuff after all :( Last year it was our first time visiting NZ so we were all like 888DDDD so I got a shitload of touristy stuff and all of you got pretty things but this year... we're eating and moving a lot so we haven't gone to any nice shopping places! Though tomorrow we're going to Tasmania's Biggest Shopping Mall, but it's hard to get touristy stuff at malls! :( I have a long list of people I want to get stuff for and most likely you're in it but ahh!
5. I realised that my tan lines are very very bad. I remember last year I told Alicia jokingly that maybe I shouldn't join OSL or I'd get a bad spec tan AND OMG I DID. I look like some goggle monster.
6. Just now as I was excitedly replying the "Sok An!" email we entered this other region with another service provider and basically I used Internet from a provider that I wasn't supposed to omg I hope the bill doesn't skyrocket!!
7. I also realised that every time we have free time to use the Internet, my sister goes on Twitter, my brother goes on Twitter and Facebook, and I go on Gmail. a. I think I'm kinda nerdy. b. START EMAILING ME!!!
GOING TO ...SHEEPLAND TOMORROWWW. And I'll only be back on the 28th, just in time to die from CCAO and Cheer. This holiday period actually makes me kind of miss Singapore :/
But nevermind I'm going to get internet everywhere and I will EMAIL all of you! Kway Laura remember my June rants while y'all were off looking at European things? 8D
Now I spend the day at home searching for places to stay in NZ :(
I've written and deleted chunks of text repeatedly because I have no idea how to start this, so I'm just going to go straight into it.
I think the main lesson OSL taught me was to appreciate everything I have. That everything we take for granted- electricity, water to drink, potable tap water, the Internet, a computer, even a house made of cement and bricks- is a blessing, and we are incredibly lucky to have it.
And what do we do? We complain. We think it's never enough. We're always wanting that something more, and we're never ever satisfied with what we have.
Something we realised in Cambodia is that maybe we don't deserve what we have. Compared to the selfless, helpful, respectful (in a way we don't even give to our own teachers), kind, amazing Cambodians who did so much to help us within the five days and were so thankful for a service we couldn't even provide fully, I think we all agreed that they deserved it more.
So during one Facil, we told Christine and Gloria about what we felt- about how we were disgusted at ourselves, about how unfair things are and how we felt bad that these people who are the best people I know, may only get a fraction of what we get. So they said, there's no use feeling bad. What are you going to do about it?
Another Facil, we put together everything the Cambodians have done for us. Lent us two classrooms, their toilet, their basketball court. Provided us with so many youth translators, some of which stayed over in school to help us. Set up lights so we could see. Turned the generator on just for us. And still they asked - what can we do to make you satisfied with our service? Still they apologised for all the inconvenience they may have caused, just because we're from Singapore. So they said, what are you going to do, to justify all that they have done for us?
There are so many things I want to do, and I'm very very scared that I might lose it all. That one day it'll just go back to whatever, it doesn't make a difference. But I'm going to hold on to emotions - what I felt that Thursday night when it hit us that even if the Cambodians may work ten times as hard as we do, they might not achieve their dream, just because they don't have enough opportunities, enough money. I'm just going to hold on to the fact that everything I do, I will do it for them. To justify that I'm provided with quality education, that I'm provided with clean water, a bed with a mattress, electricity.
I really don't know how to say it, but OSL really teaches you a lot. Before the trip, I was really quite distant from OSL, because I didn't like the structure and all the intended learning and all that. But like what Jocie and Rae-Ann told me- the trip is very very worth it. And without the intended learning I honestly doubt I'd have learnt much.
And I know that even though not many of us want to try for mentorship, I hope the mentors know that it's got nothing to do with what they did or didn't do. It's really a personal choice for all of us, and for me, I want to focus on Guides and Cheer next year because I already have so much to do for them and I don't want to apply for mentor only to compromise on how much I give to all three of them.
I hope they know that right now Team 2 is more than ready to serve, and that right now we have a whole chain of emails of what we want to do for Sok An. I hope they know they've taught us so so so much, and the number of applicants is definitely not an accurate representation of how brilliant they have been, as mentors.
AHH OSL I LOVE ALL OF YOU THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH AN AWESOME TEAM ♥♥♥ OSL Cambodia 2010!
