#547; now here we stand, unafraid of the future
Saturday, December 11, 2010
I've written and deleted chunks of text repeatedly because I have no idea how to start this, so I'm just going to go straight into it.
I think the main lesson OSL taught me was to appreciate everything I have. That everything we take for granted- electricity, water to drink, potable tap water, the Internet, a computer, even a house made of cement and bricks- is a blessing, and we are incredibly lucky to have it.
And what do we do? We complain. We think it's never enough. We're always wanting that something more, and we're never ever satisfied with what we have.
Something we realised in Cambodia is that maybe we don't deserve what we have. Compared to the selfless, helpful, respectful (in a way we don't even give to our own teachers), kind, amazing Cambodians who did so much to help us within the five days and were so thankful for a service we couldn't even provide fully, I think we all agreed that they deserved it more.
So during one Facil, we told Christine and Gloria about what we felt- about how we were disgusted at ourselves, about how unfair things are and how we felt bad that these people who are the best people I know, may only get a fraction of what we get. So they said, there's no use feeling bad. What are you going to do about it?
Another Facil, we put together everything the Cambodians have done for us. Lent us two classrooms, their toilet, their basketball court. Provided us with so many youth translators, some of which stayed over in school to help us. Set up lights so we could see. Turned the generator on just for us. And still they asked - what can we do to make you satisfied with our service? Still they apologised for all the inconvenience they may have caused, just because we're from Singapore. So they said, what are you going to do, to justify all that they have done for us?
There are so many things I want to do, and I'm very very scared that I might lose it all. That one day it'll just go back to whatever, it doesn't make a difference. But I'm going to hold on to emotions - what I felt that Thursday night when it hit us that even if the Cambodians may work ten times as hard as we do, they might not achieve their dream, just because they don't have enough opportunities, enough money. I'm just going to hold on to the fact that everything I do, I will do it for them. To justify that I'm provided with quality education, that I'm provided with clean water, a bed with a mattress, electricity.
I really don't know how to say it, but OSL really teaches you a lot. Before the trip, I was really quite distant from OSL, because I didn't like the structure and all the intended learning and all that. But like what Jocie and Rae-Ann told me- the trip is very very worth it. And without the intended learning I honestly doubt I'd have learnt much.
And I know that even though not many of us want to try for mentorship, I hope the mentors know that it's got nothing to do with what they did or didn't do. It's really a personal choice for all of us, and for me, I want to focus on Guides and Cheer next year because I already have so much to do for them and I don't want to apply for mentor only to compromise on how much I give to all three of them.
I hope they know that right now Team 2 is more than ready to serve, and that right now we have a whole chain of emails of what we want to do for Sok An. I hope they know they've taught us so so so much, and the number of applicants is definitely not an accurate representation of how brilliant they have been, as mentors.
AHH OSL I LOVE ALL OF YOU THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH AN AWESOME TEAM ♥♥♥
OSL Cambodia 2010!
7:00 PM
