#428; pick yourself up and dust yourself off
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Bio PT has been taking away any blogging time I'm sorry!
I used to wonder why some people updated so little since blogging isn't that time consuming but now I realise it isn't the time it's just the general why the hell would I blog if I have work to do-ness.
I'm not going to talk about what happened recently (initiative was fun though love the sec ones and our jumpshots teehee), just a lot of things that I've been thinking of and they're not going to make any sense so it's not you, it's me (and I'm afraid we can't go on any longer, I'm sorry, I really am).
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I've been thinking about this for really long - why do people excel in things? And why does excelling in things link to passion?
Do you have a desire to excel in things, and by the success, you find that you love it? And if you do, does that mean you don't love something, you just love success? And if you look at it that way it makes you a bad person, in my opinion. I don't like ulterior motives, and I think loving something for the success it brings you is just wrong.
Or do you love it, and that sprouts the desire to do your best in it, and hence excel in it? If so where does the love come from? Do you just wake up in the morning and realise, I like doing this, I don't like doing that? And how'd you even know if you love it?
Does one make you different from the other?
I'm not one to judge I think.
I don't get how you can put your heart into something you know nothing about. Something you've had no experience in whatsoever and yet somehow you've decided that you love it? Are you
serious?! Sometimes I wonder if you really love anything that you put in so much effort into everything you do, or if it's just this desperate self-worth-proving need that gives you the success, and that's what you love.
And sometimes I think I'm being too mean by questioning your motives when it might have been sincere all the way.
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"No matter how devoted you are to something, people
I'd hate to think that people are questioning my motives, because if they're even there I've questioned myself a lot before I dared voice out/make a decision regarding anything important to me.
But then again I question many people's motives, because no matter how hard you try you can't trust everyone completely, can you, and it's a shitty feeling, that you have to judge your friends.
And I think I'm going to stop, because nobody can lie their way through life without a punishment/retribution in store for them, regardless of what I think, so I'll just take things as they are.
I still think it's really sad that no matter how much you give to something people won't take it at face value.
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IT'S NOT A BASIC CORE COMMITMENT AND YOU HAVE OTHER COMMITMENTS BUT IT'S STILL A COMMITMENT ARGH.
(no I haven't gotten over it and it sucks because I expected a lot more of you)
(all of you)
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I don't like how you use your take advantage of your advantages - just because you can probably go to whatever university you want, whenever, doesn't mean you'll have an easy life if you keep up with your current attitude.
And I really should get back to Bio.
I think if anything, Sec 3 year is making me more disciplined :D
4:45 PM
